Here I sit, in a corner of my room on the only space of carpet that is free of bulging, needing-to-be-packed “stuff”, pondering the ramifications of tomorrow. Tonight and tomorrow will no doubt be the most difficult part of this journey. I am ecstatic about going to the Amazon River, providing clean drinking water to prolong countless lives, proclaiming “Jesus is Lord”, teaching young people about God’s word in word and deed -- every bit of ministry excites me to the core of my being because I know I was fashioned for this very purpose – to glorify God.
The “going” is thrilling.
The “leaving” terrifies me.
I fully trust that God “works all things together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purposes” (Romans 8:28). However on a very honest note, I will admit that I’ve been doing a lot of traveling this summer, and my flesh very much wishes to forget the callings of God on my life (and every believer’s- Matthew 28:18-20), to sit on my lovely red sofa, sip my sweet tea, eat some fried rice from Osaka, and continue my recently-developed LOST obsession. These desires are easily banished when the Lord brings to my remembrance Luke 9:23- 25. But as I’ve expressed previously, the core of the issue lies in the fact that it is difficult for me to leave, for such a long period, my family and close friends. These are people who have invested some much in me and I into them. They are such an integral part of my life. At times, it literally hurts to be distanced. Yet isn’t this the same type of passion God desires of us? Moses urged the Israelites in Deuteronomy13: 3b-4,
“For the Lord your God is testing you, to know whether you love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul. You shall walk after the Lord your God and fear him and keep his commandments and obey his voice, and you shall serve him and hold fast to him.”
We serve a personal God, who is passionate about intimacy with his bride in order to bring glory to himself. As David Platt writes in his new book, "Radical",
“God delights in using ordinary Christians who come to the end of themselves and choose to trust in his extraordinary provision. He stands ready to allocate his power to all who are radically dependent on him and radically devoted to making much of him.”
Father,
In my joys and struggles, in my faith and fears, in trust and in moments of doubt, in the midst of pain or the presence of gladness, in despair or Spirit-led contentment, remind me of this life’s purpose in living for your glory. Guide me into opportunities that will make much of you.
Lord you are my life. Bind me to you in such a way, Father, that all my wrongdoings would cease because I can no longer withstand being ripped from you. Thank you for these circumstances in my life that are causing me to cling to you. I am nothing apart from you. Jesus, you truly are all I need! In this passionate intimacy, Lord, would you continue to change me, that I may be a reflection of your love to all nations.
In the words of David Brainerd, "God, let be make a difference for you that is utterly disproportionate to who I am."
*"Radical", a great read for every American believer!
No comments:
Post a Comment